The tougher circumstances of life today has taken its toll on many marriages. The ups and downs of modern life, along with the high rate of unemployment, have put relationships under strain. If you are concerned for the longevity of your relationship, then something needs to be done as soon as possible. More and more people are finding that marriage counseling is helping to put the pieces back into place.
It is not always the case when both persons agree to go for outside assistance. There could be a number of reasons why someone may be hesitant, even if they know that it could help. When you have to discuss going to a counselor with your spouse, it is best if it is done in a certain way, so that the most beneficial outcome can be achieved.
Choose your moment to bring up the subject carefully. If you or your partner is tired or stressed then it is better to wait. A time when you can both sit down and talk without any interruptions is best. Also, when you are alone is best, as you do not want to bring anyone else into the conversation. Your explanation should be positive, and in a way that will help your spouse to understand that it could improve your relationship.
A counselor will see either a couple or just one person, therefore, if your spouse refuses to go then you can still attend the sessions. However, it will be best if you are both present. If you are forced to go on your own, stay committed, and see if you can learn some ways of helping the relationship. Your partner may change his mind in time.
If your partner has agreed to work with you, then you are off to a good start. When both of you agree on the path to take in order to improve your relationship, then you can start to consider the outcome that you desire. Before you even start the sessions with the counselor, you can make a list of goals. Note why you are attending and what you hope to achieve. The list can be made with your spouse or on your own, but should be shared.
While you are noting your goals, make a few additional points as well. These will be the things that you feel need work. The types of things that you feel are a problem within your relationship. They can be brought forth to the counselor.
Although you are noting the negative aspects, start to work on the positive side of things as well. Write down everything you like about your partner and the relationship, and try to develop a more positive attitude. Both partners should make their own lists, and they can be shared.
Many couples can benefit from marriage counseling, not only those who are thinking of getting a divorce. Couples who have been under strain from substance abuse or the loss of a child can benefit, and just-married couples can enjoy learning some good communications skills. Try to choose a counselor who is professional and who has credentials.
It is not always the case when both persons agree to go for outside assistance. There could be a number of reasons why someone may be hesitant, even if they know that it could help. When you have to discuss going to a counselor with your spouse, it is best if it is done in a certain way, so that the most beneficial outcome can be achieved.
Choose your moment to bring up the subject carefully. If you or your partner is tired or stressed then it is better to wait. A time when you can both sit down and talk without any interruptions is best. Also, when you are alone is best, as you do not want to bring anyone else into the conversation. Your explanation should be positive, and in a way that will help your spouse to understand that it could improve your relationship.
A counselor will see either a couple or just one person, therefore, if your spouse refuses to go then you can still attend the sessions. However, it will be best if you are both present. If you are forced to go on your own, stay committed, and see if you can learn some ways of helping the relationship. Your partner may change his mind in time.
If your partner has agreed to work with you, then you are off to a good start. When both of you agree on the path to take in order to improve your relationship, then you can start to consider the outcome that you desire. Before you even start the sessions with the counselor, you can make a list of goals. Note why you are attending and what you hope to achieve. The list can be made with your spouse or on your own, but should be shared.
While you are noting your goals, make a few additional points as well. These will be the things that you feel need work. The types of things that you feel are a problem within your relationship. They can be brought forth to the counselor.
Although you are noting the negative aspects, start to work on the positive side of things as well. Write down everything you like about your partner and the relationship, and try to develop a more positive attitude. Both partners should make their own lists, and they can be shared.
Many couples can benefit from marriage counseling, not only those who are thinking of getting a divorce. Couples who have been under strain from substance abuse or the loss of a child can benefit, and just-married couples can enjoy learning some good communications skills. Try to choose a counselor who is professional and who has credentials.
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